[0:01]
so I'm out here film my water tank got
[0:04]
to hold it in place cuz it keeps coming
[0:06]
out most does um I have to do this cuz
[0:10]
my hose is still broken I haven't been
[0:12]
able to replace it or fix when I have
[0:14]
might be able to fix it I just haven't
[0:16]
tried to do that yet I fig since I'm out
[0:18]
here might as well get up on that roof
[0:21]
so I'm not here for much longer today
[0:24]
Saturday I leave Monday might as well
[0:26]
take care of that so we're going to do
[0:28]
that in a minute um but I just want to
[0:30]
start by
[0:31]
saying uh I was having a conversation
[0:33]
with AI and I know I knew this pattern
[0:36]
about myself but it recognized it and
[0:38]
that made me think about it um I use the
[0:42]
word just a lot like is this a way of
[0:44]
minimizing or only like like I just went
[0:46]
hiking 8 miles or maybe only this one
[0:50]
beach you know like kind of minimizing
[0:52]
language because I don't own my whole
[0:54]
power like I should I noticed I do that
[0:57]
a lot in work my work emails and stuff
[0:59]
like that
[1:00]
you and I recently noticed it in the
[1:02]
last couple weeks and just stopped doing
[1:04]
it like I consciously tried to stop
[1:07]
doing it so I asked Claud I was like
[1:10]
what other phrases might I be using or
[1:13]
you know that people use that that are
[1:16]
you know around the same topic and it
[1:17]
gave me a less I'll screenshot it up
[1:20]
here and I'm going to try to note it is
[1:22]
a it's a homework assignment for me now
[1:25]
because I truly believe that you
[1:27]
shouldn't minimize yourself don't do it
[1:29]
for anybody you know own who you are own
[1:32]
own your own your power own your
[1:33]
sovereignty and so if you see me doing
[1:36]
it if you see it in a video point it out
[1:38]
maybe I don't know deci don't
[1:40]
know um there it is I don't know that's
[1:44]
when I do know that's that's it right
[1:47]
there so you're going to be seeing that
[1:50]
on my channel now
[1:51]
because yeah I have my brain I have my
[1:54]
brain
[1:56]
like trying to flag when it happens this
[1:59]
is what growth looks
[2:01]
like okay let's do this got Bailey
[2:05]
outside it's chilling over there being a
[2:07]
cat oh I flip the camera on accident and
[2:10]
we're going up here we're going up here
[2:13]
let me just pause this so I'm going to
[2:14]
need both hands let me just say this so
[2:16]
this is my fourth time up here I'm
[2:18]
pretty
[2:19]
sure I got my stabilizers down so it'll
[2:22]
be a little butter than the last time
[2:24]
that was a little weird but I I did it I
[2:27]
managed it some of you know this is hard
[2:30]
for me I had a real hard time getting up
[2:32]
there when I was in Kentucky but watch
[2:34]
this all right we're up here um it's not
[2:37]
as bad as I thought it's actually not
[2:39]
that bad got a few branches but I mean
[2:41]
after a 80 mph storm I expected a lot
[2:45]
worse bye
[2:47]
Bailey okay feeling a little bit dizzy
[2:49]
there um guess just Center myself I'm
[2:53]
going to turn this off so I can listen
[2:54]
to my music and just get this done and
[2:56]
then yeah hold on my cat's watching me
[3:01]
he looks a little worried there I'm
[3:03]
right here
[3:05]
buddy I'm right
[3:07]
here this the hard part kind of just
[3:11]
throw the broom down and do it
[3:14]
carefully yeah I did a good job all
[3:19]
clean I'm not going to pretend I don't
[3:21]
have fear when I do I'm just going to
[3:22]
show you that you can work with fear I'm
[3:24]
up here I'm doing this whatever you are
[3:27]
afraid of whatever brings you fear
[3:31]
work with yours
[3:32]
okay you know what let me expand on that
[3:36]
so what does it mean to work with fear
[3:39]
it means to acknowledge it it means to
[3:40]
sit with it it means to think about it
[3:43]
it means
[3:44]
to do things one little step at a time
[3:48]
whatever it takes it
[3:50]
means it means knowing you have this
[3:53]
fear and knowing that one day you will
[3:57]
conquer it but not in a suppression kind
[4:00]
of a way where you're just like fighting
[4:02]
it and trying
[4:04]
to pretend like it's not there because
[4:07]
that's that's not going to help
[4:09]
you I know not all of you have been with
[4:12]
me since the beginning so you haven't
[4:13]
seen my journey getting up on that roof
[4:15]
that was difficult but I sat
[4:18]
with it I talked about it and video
[4:20]
after video you know whenever it was
[4:21]
like I really need to go up there I
[4:23]
couldn't get up there
[4:26]
yet do the same thing uh went up a
[4:29]
mountain and this mountain scared
[4:32]
me I wanted to understand why I have a
[4:35]
whole video about that it's in my
[4:36]
playlist I have one playlist now it's
[4:38]
about my journey from Kentucky to here
[4:41]
somewhere in there it's like tackling
[4:43]
the mountain or whatever I walk you
[4:45]
through what that's
[4:48]
like believe me fear doesn't not have to
[4:51]
stop you it can be your
[4:54]
ally hey everybody I'm just hanging out
[4:57]
here healing basically
[5:00]
my chest is so sore my core muscles
[5:04]
are actually do feel of course here
[5:06]
comes Bailey that took what one second
[5:09]
one second
[5:11]
right um oh yeah so I had to point to
[5:15]
this whole video right
[5:18]
obviously I didn't think this through
[5:20]
let me try again so I was just laying
[5:23]
here thinking and um I'm going to try
[5:26]
something new on my channel so I just
[5:27]
thought I should talk about it so in the
[5:30]
past I've
[5:32]
always treated my camera my channel like
[5:36]
I was just talking to humanity in
[5:40]
general that kind
[5:43]
of ba you're killing me this cat weighs
[5:46]
15 PBS I mean this is like it's so much
[5:49]
all the time like I that's so
[5:52]
much
[5:55]
um I don't know what the right word for
[5:57]
this is I just I kind of treated it like
[5:59]
it was a a distance thing I guess like
[6:01]
it allowed me to just keep a distance
[6:05]
and talk about my feelings on Humanity
[6:09]
because I
[6:11]
mean I'm a very deep person
[6:16]
and I had a lot of thoughts on Humanity
[6:19]
you know trying to grow up in this world
[6:21]
live in this world navigate this world
[6:23]
like I had a lot of things I needed to
[6:25]
say and I wasn't druged that at anybody
[6:28]
in particular I want clear about that it
[6:30]
truly wasn't it's just people in general
[6:33]
the world in general Society in general
[6:36]
you know all of that but ever since
[6:40]
having my heart woken up I I mean I call
[6:42]
it that but it's not really about my
[6:44]
heart being woken up it's more
[6:46]
like there was just a shift inside of me
[6:49]
and I'm so much more open to
[6:52]
just just connection right
[6:55]
so um and that's manifesting in kinds of
[7:00]
different ways it's
[7:04]
just so much has shifted inside of me so
[7:07]
anyways one of those ways
[7:11]
is I feel like my Channel's going to
[7:13]
change because like I already see myself
[7:15]
like asking how you're doing like did
[7:18]
you go do something you know like this
[7:20]
morning
[7:22]
um open you know the comments are open
[7:25]
again and I'm genuinely like
[7:33]
I'm just navigating all new territory
[7:35]
here and I just want to acknowledge that
[7:36]
[Music]
[7:38]
and say that probably how I use the word
[7:41]
you it's a little more direct
[7:48]
because I
[7:49]
guess once you reach the state that I
[7:53]
have like I know I say it all the time
[7:55]
I'm integrated blah blah blah everybody
[7:57]
can be that way okay this isn't some
[7:59]
unique thing it's just it's just I've
[8:01]
done the work my whole damn life and
[8:03]
nobody else really does so but you know
[8:06]
to varying degrees they
[8:08]
do and you know I'll acknowledge that I
[8:11]
don't want to sound like I got this for
[8:13]
him because he keeps getting out of his
[8:16]
harnesses and I never took it off he's
[8:18]
never even used it I just I just keep it
[8:20]
on and whatever it's I got it a dollar
[8:23]
store though it looks kind of silly like
[8:25]
I'd want to get him something a little
[8:26]
criter this colar is a little ridiculous
[8:29]
but he hasn't tried to take it off he
[8:31]
seems to like
[8:32]
it and I guess that's
[8:35]
enough man you just know how to get
[8:37]
attention don't
[8:39]
you he cute though he is developing and
[8:43]
I actually could use a vice on this if
[8:45]
you guys haven't he is developing
[8:49]
this big knot on his back from all his
[8:52]
Fern and I can't get I can't get it
[8:54]
undone I don't know what to do about it
[8:56]
so um I've tried like like I thought
[9:00]
about taking a razor to it but AI told
[9:02]
me that that was dangerous cuz their
[9:03]
skin gets all wrapped up in that stuff
[9:05]
and I don't know what to do you I truly
[9:07]
don't know what to do for him it doesn't
[9:09]
seem to be bothering him yet but it is a
[9:11]
problem I don't know how to deal with it
[9:14]
so um anyways I just I guess I don't
[9:18]
really have a point more of an
[9:20]
acknowledgement
[9:21]
that I think my channel is changing
[9:24]
because I'm changing and we're
[9:25]
navigating new territory let's leave it
[9:27]
at that